Did you ever get the urge to jump from a high building? I don’t mean suicide, I mean that feeling you get, when you’re standing on the edge of a cliff or on the lip of a high building, when it crosses your mind to throw yourself off. I have it quite a lot. Along with the urge to drive my car into a wall, or take my hands off the wheel whilst driving high speed on the motorway.
Søren Kierkegaard spoke about it in his Concept of Anxiety, refering to it as our ‘dizziness of freedom’. The realisation that we were free to do whatever we want, makes us anxious and at the same time gives us a true incite into our potential. You could jump, it’s very much within your control, but in most cases you won’t. Mainly you’ll walk away from the edge, or grip the wheel of the car a little tighter and think ‘what the fuck was that about?’
Now you know
Apropos of nothing.
It’s a busy time of year at SS Garden Centre. Everything I’ve been fighting to keep alive since spring is coming to fruition and now it’s a struggle to pick it all, before it dies. One line that keeps popping into my head, while I’m dragging another plastic bag of peas into the house (two hours, from plant to freezer, for one Morrisons bag of peas!) is from the Doors, ‘where’s the new wine, dieing on the vine?’ It gives me an incentive, when I’m knackered after work, to lumber up the garden and pick what needs picking. I also find myself reciting harvest festival songs from schoool. In my head, obviously. It would be bad enough if you could hear me cursing the flies that buzz my head while I’m working (will you fuck off, you horrible little bastard!!), let alone have me droning out random songs of thanksgiving aswell
Shit load of peas
Not that I’m moaning. It’s what we moved here to do – grab a bit of the country life, grow your own. I can honestly say that growing my own stuff is the only thing I’ve ever done where I haven’t, at some point, gone ‘Man, that’s shit. You’ve done that wrong’. You can’t really beat yourself up over it, because apart from breeding and hunting things in woods, it’s one of the oldest, most necessary things we can do. This stuff has been going on for millenia and I’m coming into it late. Good fun though, recommend it. When ‘they’ say that your own produce tastes better, it’s true.
It’s been a real struggle to find anything I want to post today. Not much about and the veg is screaming to be picked. These two have been on the I-pod though. Well worth a listen.
Fenech Soler – Stop And Stare – MP3
Hurts – Wonderful Life (Freemasons Remix)
Not forgetting this ace mix from Erol ‘I’m a little like God’ Alkan